by Alia Eva
49 Things I Want My Kids to Know
- Tom will never catch Jerry.
- “We’ll see” means “no” in adult language.
- Being nice to people is not something you regret no matter how they respond.
- Honesty is the best policy. Always.
- Go with your gut feeling. Your gut will doubtlessly never be wrong.
- You don’t need make-up to be beautiful
- READ. It’s one of the best things in the world.
- Movies will never be better than the books
- Never go through a “kewl” phase on Facebook. It will come back to haunt you.
- Never say no to chocolate.
- Punch anyone in the face who says shit against your country.
- When someone is upset over something, don’t start giving them unwanted advice, just listen to them and tell them you’re sorry.
- Our family Sunday tradition will be hogging on chocolates and pizza and lasagna while having a Harry Potter movie marathon.
- Just because everyone’s doing it doesn’t mean it’s the right thing.
- Throw your trash in the bin.
- Nothing will grab you from under the bed at night.
- Life isn’t fair; get used to it.
- Proper use of your and you’re.
- Pokemon will always be the best anime.
- Your idea of music should never be Miley Cyrus, One Direction or Justin Beiber.
- Apologize ONLY when you’re wrong.
- Don’t create a mess of your wardrobe. Just don’t.
- Don’t be scared to voice your opinions just because they’re different than others.
- Everyone deserves the benefit of doubt.
- Be curious.
- Feminism is unreasonable crap, don’t be a feminist unless you want me to disown you.
- Your sense of humor will take you a long way.
- Your mom used to hate kids. USED TO.
- Adults aren’t as perfect as you think them to be.
- What makes you stronger might also be your weakest ladder.
- The Godfather will always be the best trilogy of all time.
- Confidence is sexy.
- Ted Mosby doesn’t meet his wife till like the end of eighth season.
- Always be proud of yourself, unless you’re a douche.
- Schools won’t teach you anything about real life.
- You’ll lose friends, but you’ll gain better ones.
- Doctors will never be as hot as Grey’s Anatomy shows them to be.
- You can swear (though I prefer you don’t). But NEVER ever abuse anyone.
- It’s better to be life-smart than book-smart.
- We all make mistakes, but it’s only a mistake if you don’t repeat it after repenting.
- Don’t be afraid to try. You’ll regret not trying.
- Not many things are more painful than childbirth.
- Eat lots. But always eat healthy. Chocolates are healthy, yes.
- Don’t use the “:)” emoticon with me, it’s creepy.
- Don’t ever text me back with a K.
- Not everything needs to be put up as your status update on Facebook.
- Weird unrelated quotations are not necessary in your photo captions.
- It’s okay to cry when Mufasa dies in Lion King no matter how old you are.
- Your mom wrote this at the age of seventeen after five days of a serious writer’s block.
